here goes the front page of my new ‘etc’ notebook for school and scouting. yey. the back part is simple so yeah.
This flower could probably be seen everywhere. From up the roof or from as low as the ground but this is to show how much I want you to be here, right now. I hate to say this. But I miss you, I terribly do. You would have to claim me numb and stupid if I didn’t because the times when you said hello, the times when you used to do hard things just for me, the times when you acted so cautiously of what was going on are slowly dying. I have no right to accuse you of anything but you can’t blame me for missing who you used to be. How shallow and mindless my day is just thinking what might the reason be of your absence, your lack of living presence and your lack of care but you made me think that way. I don’t hate you neither am I angry with you, I just miss you, that’s all and I’m not expecting for some instant and preposterous comeback just because you find me missing you. I just want you to realize how much I’m blatantly missing your personality.
Because having a photoshoot with yourself (by yourself, i mean doing everything all on your own. the settings, the tripod, the remote, the posing) is hard and tiring. I’ve to be thankful because I’m very inspired lately ♥ My face awhile ago, haggard and exhausted.
In our school, joining scouting is compulsory for reasons that will lead back to being a prompt Filipino citizen. At first I had to agree with my negative and judgmental self because it looked so lame, the walks, the commands and the things you have to memorize. But now I’m simply attending summer training in our school for the reason of being a scout officer and I swear I need the grades for next school year and I have attended a 3-day survival camp simply because the opportunity was rare and I was chosen out of 6 from our batch. I don’t know why but my productivity rate has been raised from 1 to 10. Everytime scouting seemingly peeks into my thoughts, I’ve been constantly desperate on what to do to improve our quarter, this and that and whatnot. And this is why I’m out on Tuesdays and Thursdays from as early as 4 in the morning until 11. Busy summer—oh dope! Not really.